I Wish I Could Stop These 3 Bra Worries

There are 3 big bra fit worries that cause women to make bad bra fit choices. I wish I could stop the worry because a lot of the time it stems from how we think other people see us which shouldn't be the reason we make choices. Hopefully one day most women won't worry about the size, shape or sheer presence of their breasts. Until then I want to share why trying to 'cover up' your breast worries with these 3 bad fit choices doesn't help you at all.

1) Wearing a loose bra band because you're worried about back fat and think a loose band makes it less noticeable.

I'm afraid the loose band only rides up your back and takes any excess skin and fat with it.

In a well-fitting bra the excess fat bulges around the back of your armpit where you can see it. In a loose band the fat either gets pulled up between your shoulder blades or pushed down towards the middle of your back where you can't necessarily see it. The big difference is that now the bra is also putting a huge strain on the nerves and muscles in your neck which can cause trapped nerves, headaches and pain.

Related Article: Bra Fit and Back Fat

Your health and comfort are so much better in a well-fitting bra. I know I'm not going to convince everyone that the fat you can see just doesn't matter (it doesn't!) so if it really bothers you you can smooth it out with deep band or shapewear.

The fat is there no matter what band you wear but not wearing a supportive bra because you're worried about back fat is ultimately a disservice to your physical and mental well-being.

2) Wearing cups and/or a band that's too big so that your boobs don't look as big.

Boobs size is all relative. Your breasts may seem huge to you but are average size, even small, to someone else. Your breasts may seem huge to you because of the stereotypes someone else's ignorance has drummed into you. Your breasts may be huge... AND THAT'S OK!

One thing is for sure, when you wear a bra that's too big in the band and/or cups then your breasts will look larger than they are. This is because the breast tissue spreads wide across your body so appear to take up more surface area. By getting your breasts into a smaller, narrower wire your breasts won't look as big so it's worth getting your size checked with a free bra size consultation.

Image has been airbrushed around the nipple at the model's request

3) Wearing smooth cup bras because you worry that someone will see the seams of your bra through your clothing.

This is something I've written about a lot because seam fear, especially in North America, is keeping women from the support they need. Smooth bras don't work for everyone because some breast shapes and weights need the support and shaping of seams to get the healthiest and most comfortable fit.

If you worry about seams then I urge you to read these two articles and give a seamed bra another chance!

Sorry to Break it to You but People Know You're Wearing a Bra
Smooth Cup Bras: Fit, Health and Body Shame

I'd love everyone to have a happy and comfortable relationship with their bras. Working through your bra worries is an important part of better, happier bra fit xx

It's Better Not to Wear a Bra than Wear the Wrong Bra

Choosing not to wear a bra is a conscious decision and while it may be uncommon amongst full bust women it's still a choice that many make for aesthetic, comfort or health reasons. Choosing to wear the wrong bra is a less conscious decision. It's less of a choice and more of a last resort born out of a western norm of wearing bras and a lack of choice born out of most women only having access to 32+ A-D bras. Besides it being uncommon for busty women to go braless there are also some physical and health concerns about being busty and braless.

Lots of people think that women who don't wear a bra are doing themselves damage but there is actually very little data on whether low impact daily activities actually cause damage to your breasts and skin. Many women simply don't see going braless as an option because it's too painful to be unsupported (the larger your bust, the greater the gravitational pull on the ligaments in your breasts and this can be very painful). There is more information about the impact of not wearing a bra when working out. I wouldn't recommend that anyone works out without a bra because the impact on the ligaments and milk ducts inside your breasts can cause strain that is painful.

There is a potential rash/irritation hazard to your skin when not wearing a bra because moisture can get trapped between your breasts and your torso and prevent air circulating, especially if you're sat for long periods. Some women finding nipple chafing too painful to go without bras and don't like adhesive covers. On the whole though there is very little evidence that going braless is bad for your health (breast sag is primarily dictated by your genes, diet and skin care - for example, over exposure to the sun can cause your skin to become thinner and sag). On the flip side, there is a wealth of evidence about the damage a badly fitting bra can do to your health.

The most common mistake with bra fit is wearing a bra that is too big for you in the band and too small in the cup. A band that's too big for you can cause shoulder and neck pain, back ache, headaches, shoulder dents, chafing, skin irritations and bruising. Wearing a cup that's too small means that your breast tissue is often squished against other skin tissue which traps moisture (a perfect breeding ground for bacteria rashes) and prevents air circulating around your skin - all skin prefers to breathe.

When I see women wearing the wrong bra it breaks my heart because I know that it's not a choice, it's a last resort that's not empowering or comfortable. When I see a woman choosing not to wear a bra I see a conscious decision that is far better for your health than subjecting your breasts to the problems caused by the wrong cup, band and style. This is why the conversation about bra fit outside of the A-D paradigm is so important because millions of women still don't know they don't have to resign themselves to painful fit and they don't have to abandon bras, they can choose to be comfortable and happy in their bras with the right size and fit. xx

Video: Are We in A Bad Bra Fit Cycle

In my video blog this week I am once again tackling the subject of why the statistic about 80% of women being in the wrong bra size doesn't seem to have changed in many years. Just today I have read two articles from leading women's magazines giving out bra advice that is just plain wrong. With so many magazines, day time TV segments and boutiques dishing out the wrong information how can we spot good from bad fitting information.

I give you some insight to why this horrid statistic perpetuates and how we can begin to get rid of it. I hope you find it useful! xx

Is Holistic or Tape Measure Bra Fitting Better?

First of all I should probably explain what Holistic Bra Fitting means. Some of you may have been to a lingerie store where the assistant helping you hasn't used a tape measure to determine your size but instead has just looked at you, maybe asked what size you're currently wearing and brought you a bra size to try on.

Holistic bra fitting judges which size you need based on how well your current bra fits, your build, height and posture. Considering how many stores use a tape measure incorrectly to figure out your size (Hello Plus Four Method!) it's not surprising that some stores choose to avoid it completely.

The five main fit signs used to assess size in the holistic approach are:

1) Are the cups spilling over or wrinkling
2) Is the band too loose or tight
3) Does the gore lie flat against the body
4) Are the straps digging into the shoulders
5) Is the band at the same height all the way around the body

Determining your bra size using a tape measure uses the difference between your ribcage measurement and the measurement around the fullest part of your bust to figure out the best band and cup sizes to start with. There are lots of other factors that affect your bra size so this is why the tape measure method should only be used as a starting point as we explain in our Bra Calculator.

Lots of people think that the holistic approach to bra fitting is better than using a tape measure and others think that the tape measure is better. My personal approach is that these two techniques are not mutually exclusive and you should use both to find and maintain your best bra size.

The five fit signs are hugely helpful for working out whether you need a smaller band, larger cup size etc. The reason I don't think you should rely on the holistic signs alone is that they don't give you a base size to work from or towards. Let me explain.

The fit signs are essential for figuring out if you need a different size e.g. a spilling cup says you need a bigger cup

Lots of women who contact Butterfly Collection for a free bra size consultation are wearing a bra band that is six, eight and even ten inches bigger than their body which means they can be up to five band sizes away from their best starting size. If these women relied solely on the holistic approach then they may come down just one band size and still be uncomfortable in their new bra size leaving them more disillusioned with bras and potentially giving up on finding the right size. It would take an awful lot of trial and error to find out which band and cup combination you need based solely on the holistic approach when you're five or six sizes away from your best fit.

Full explanation of Sister Sizing

I recommend using three steps to figure out your best bra size starting point. Let's take an example of a woman wearing a 40E whose bra band is riding up, cups are spilling and straps are digging in. She can find her best bra size starting point this way:

1) She measures around her ribcage and finds that she's a 32 band. She realizes that this is four band sizes smaller than she's wearing right now. This gives her a band size to work toward.

2) Using the sister size chart she works out that to get the same volume on a 32 band as she has now on her 40E she needs to go up four cup letters to a GG.

3) By assessing all of her fit signs she realizes that she is spilling over her cups (NB this might be because the band is so loose the bust isn't contained) She decides to try one cup size larger to stop the spilling so she arrives at a size of 32H.

Left just to use the holistic approach this lady may have just come down to a 38F and would still have significant issues with her fit. By measuring at least around your ribcage and knowing how to use this in conjunction with the fit signs and understanding the band to cup ratio you stand a much better chance of getting to your right bra size faster. xx

How do you know when your bra is dead?

If you have shortened your straps to gain support your bra is probably dead.

Today's blog post was suggested by one of my lovely customers who struggles to know when it's time to say goodbye to a bra. Because there are no hard and fast rules about how long a bra lasts it's important to know how to tell when your bra is dead because wearing it for a long time after it has lost its effectiveness can do you more harm than good.

Hooks
The hook and eye fastening on the back of your bra is the easiest place to start. When you buy a new bra it must fit you comfortably on the first row of hooks. This is because your bra will stretch and over time you need to be able to fasten your bra on the tighter rows to compensate for the elastic losing its tension. If you buy a bra that fits you on the second or third row of hooks then it won't fit for you for as long which means you're throwing away money.

Your bra should fit snugly on the first row of hooks so that you get the most life out of your bra

The first time you fasten your bra on the tightest set of hooks you know you have between 4 and 6 weeks left of regular wear (this depends on how often you wear it and how you wash it). If your bra doesn't show other signs of significant wear and tear (we'll cover those next) then you may be able to have the band shortened by a tailor (or do it yourself if you're good with a needle). When shortening a band it's important to shorten each side equally i.e. if you take an inch out of one side you must take an inch out of the other side. This ensures that your strap tension stays equal on each side.

Depending on how well this job is done (and the integrity of the rest of the bra) you can get a further 2 to 4 months of wear out of the bra. It won't last as long as a new bra with the same band length as the elastic has aged.

Elastic
This is the lifeblood of your bra. It's the elastic that keeps your band snug against your body (which is the part of your bra supporting most of your bust's weight) and it contributes to the shape of your cups and the support of your straps. Besides giving you support the elastic also makes your bra flexible so that it moves with you as your breathe and bend. As I've talked about before, elastic needs time to shrink back into place after it has been heated up by your body heat. This is the reason you should only wear a bra once every 3 days.

If you see white hairs appearing on the wing and band of your bra if means the elastic in the fabric has broken

No matter how well you take care of your bra the elastic will deteriorate over time and the bra will lose its support. It's worth noting that cheap bras are made with cheap elastics that stretch out quickly. More expensive bras use better grade elastics which are more resistant to heat and moisture so your investment lasts proportionally longer.

As the elastic in your bra stretches it begins to break and you will see this breakage in the fabric of your bra. Little white fronds will appear on the band, wings and straps. This is a sure fire sign that your bra is dead. No repairs or alterations will resuscitate this bra. The elastic that allows for breathing and movement is now dead so it's time to say goodbye.

The Fit
If a bra that once fit you well now seems to dig into your breastbone or poke you under the arms then you should check your fit signs (for example, is the band level at the front and back). The change in fit could be due to a change in your figure, however, it may also be an indication that the bra has died. If after checking the five fit signs you realize the bra is not giving you correct support then it's time for a new bra. If the bra still has the elastic in tact and the fabric isn't too worn then you should consider recycling it by donating to a thrift store.

Clear Damage
If there are holes in your cup or band, if there are hooks missing, wires poking through the material or any tearing on the material then your bra needs to be replaced. 

I hope this helps you figure out which of your bras need to be disposed of or recycled so that you aren't compromising your support and health on a dead bra xx

Big Boob Phobia!

I am afraid of clowns. I think they have machetes in their trouser-legs and they kill people who go to the circus. The logical side of my brain says there's probably a very small percentage of weapon-wielding, murderous funny-men but nonetheless I feel like crying when I see one. Perhaps the reason so many women have hang-ups about wearing a bra over a D cup is that they are actually suffering from Pectorusgiganticus; Fear of Big Boobs! (a word I just made up, naturally.)

Joking aside, it never ceases to amaze me how many women are afraid of bra letters over a D cup. It makes no difference what label you put on the ratio between your breast mass and your ribcage measurement (sexy right, that's what your bra size refers to) your boobs are still going to be that volume. Letter Phobia doesn't stop your boobs are spilling out of your bra or bouncing around so it's worthwhile getting educated about bra fit and what bra sizes actually mean.

Over several decades we have built up layers of phobias around boobs; women with big boobs are bimbos or promiscuous and they can't play sports or be pain-free. These phobias stem partly from a misogynistic language that keeps women feeling guilty about their bodies (but that's a topic for a whole other dissertation!) and partly from years of dreadful bra fitting knowledge. By fitting knowledge I don't just mean getting a good fitting at a boutique, I mean, being educated about bras.

As we grow up we're educated about periods, why we have them and what to do to manage them as they happen. Imagine never being told why you have periods or how a tampon should feel and work if used correctly. You'd spend your life blindly buying what you thought was best for you and wondering the whole time if there was something wrong with you. This is what we do to young girls about bras. We don't explain that bras should fit snugly at the band, how your cup size is relative to your band size and that breast sizes change regularly (every couple of weeks for some women). If we gave them this knowledge then the phobias around bras would begin to fade away.

It's such an old-fashioned idea that only a professional fitter can tell you about your boobs and bras. Your doctor gives you advice about how to live well (good diet, exercise etc) they don't just prescribe you antacid every time you have heartburn without ever explaining that cutting out fatty foods will stop the problem in the first place. Similarly a good bra-fitter should teach you about your fit, your breast shape, which styles work for you and how to keep an eye on your size. This way you'll understand your breasts and bras and there will be no room for phobia.

I think a lot of women worry that wearing a cup size over a D cup will make them look like they have big boobs. The reality is that a correctly fitting bra will make you look much more contained which makes your boobs look smaller than when they're bashing together somewhere near your waist!

If you think you might be suffering from Pectorusgiganticus then I want you to remember 3 things to try and overcome your phobia:

1) No one else needs to know your bra size so what difference does it make?
2) In the right size bra you won't bounce around or spill out of your cups (the two things that draw the kind of attention that can make you feel uncomfortable)
3) You can take your time but try to keep a piece of your mind open to the possibility that a different bra size could make you feel physically and emotionally better.

To every one of our customers and every reader of this blog I want you to know that you are changing the landscape for future generations of women. By educating yourselves about great bra fit you can pass on that gift and ensure that no-one has to suffer the terrible fear of Big Boobs!! xx

Smaller Bra Bands Are Better for Squidgy Torsos

A flesh indent caused by your bra band at your torso is completely normal

I'll say right off the bat that there is no way to be completely delicate in this article so let's lay it out on the table - we're talking about body fat. Fat can be a prickly word for some people but the reality is we've all got it and some of us have more around our torsos than others. If you carry weight around your mid-section then you might decide that you're a 'plus size' girl and discount yourself from wearing 28-38 bands and this could be your biggest mistake.

As you know at Butterfly Collection we use the +0 measurement technique as our base point for finding out your band size. For example, if you measure 34 around your ribcage then we recommend starting out with a 34 band. What may surprise you is that about 1/3 of our customers wear a bra band one, two or even three sizes smaller than their raw underbust measurement. What's even more interesting is that lots of these ladies carry extra weight around their mid-section.

Your band should be as snug as possible to give your bust the lift it deserves

Weight around your torso is spongy so if your bra band isn't tight enough it may just be bouncing around on your flesh and not getting close enough to your frame to keep your bra completely in place. It may sound as though it would hurt to squeeze into a bra band that is technically smaller than your body, however, the sponginess of the flesh around your ribs makes it ideal for wearing a supportive but breathable band.

Your best band fit depends so much on your body shape. If you compared 10 women with the same bra size they would differ greatly in height, body weight, physique and most flattering bra style. So many of us have fixed ideas in our heads about what bra sizes look like and in reality one bra size can be right for lots of different shapes of women. I have lots of customers who measure between 40 and 44 who wear a 36 or 38 band size. In a 40 band the bra simply isn't firm enough to lift the breasts at the front (which is after all what your band is doing).

How to tell if you need a smaller band
You can whip off your top right now (I take no responsibility if you flash a co-worker - use your discretion!) and your bra will tell you if it's the right band size or not. If the center part of your bra is lying flat between your breasts (no matter what body size, shape, type you are) then you're in the right band size. If there is any gap between your body and that center panel then you need a smaller band size. If you're concerned about trying a smaller band size I recommend investing in a pack of reusable, washable bra band extenders that gives you some extra wiggle room on a smaller band and peace of mind while you get used to your new bra fit.

Don't let your preconceptions about size keep you from finding your best bra fit. If you know you're not comfortable then consider trying a smaller band. xx

Extra Resource from XL Hourglass about bands for bigger bodies Click Here