The Dos and Don'ts of Returning Bras

Buying bras online often involves returning and exchanging them. When you have a good understanding of your size and which styles work for you the returns and exchanges happen far less often. The return and exchange policy will differ depending on where you buy your bras but with a few simple tips you can speed up the process of getting your refund or exchange.

There are some dos and don'ts when it comes to returning bras for a refund or exchange (we know having been on the receiving end of some strange return surprises!) Here's a handy checklist which will help you get your refund or exchange fast and without any hassle from your lingerie retailer:

Don't....
1. Cut the tags off.
2. Forget to include the tags with your returned package (they often have a barcode on them which is how they are filed and retrieved in a warehouse)
3. Smoke when trying on bras. If your home is smoky then the new bra will pick up the smell so try and keep the bras sealed in a bag and away from any smoke.
4. Send free samples of your pet's fur back with your bra! A lint roller is a cheap and easy way to ensure that bits of your pet aren't stuck to the bras you return.
5. Send bras bras back with deodorant on them. This can be tricky to avoid so a good tip is to run a sponge under medium hot water then ring it out and dab (don't wipe) on the area where you can see deodorant. The marks should come up easily and dry quickly.
6. Return your bras after the exchange/return period has expired without contacting your retailer first.

Do....
1. Send the product back in the same condition you received it.
2. Return it within the time frame that your retailer gave you at the time of purchase. Most retailers allow you to return full price bras within a fixed time period from sale.
3. Tell your retailer why you're returning the bra so they can help you figure out other options. A good retailer should be able to diagnose the fit issues you had with a style or size and be able to recommend other brands, styles or sizes either from their store or from another one. Your fit and comfort is the primary concern.

Weirdest things we've had returned
1. A bra that was sold 18 months earlier and had been worn A LOT with a note saying she expected the bra to last two years because that's how long her Aunt's bras lasted.
2. A grocery list included with the return - it gave us some ideas for dinner :)
3. A chocolate bar wrapper stuck to the bra.
4. Two beige bras covered in red lipstick and glitter - we assumed someone had a good night out!
5. Luggage tags from a flight to Hawaii from Edmonton - we'd like the tickets next time please ;)

I hope this list helps you get your returned bras dealt with quickly and without any hassle! xx

Bra Fit: 3 Things To Know About Bra Straps

The straps on a bra probably aren't the first thing you notice when choosing a bra but they can make a big difference to your fit so there are a few things you should know about bra straps to help you choose the right ones for you.

1. Pressure On Your Shoulders
One of the really big American bra manufacturers posed the question on their Facebook page "Which part of your bra should support most of your bust's weight?" The fact that the majority of their fans said "the straps" should tell them that their fit information is pretty bad! Straps are not there to take the majority of your bust's weight, that responsibility lies with your band. The straps should only be taking between 10 and 20 percent of the weight. You'll know if your bra band isn't doing its job (most likely because it's too loose) because your straps will dig into your shoulders (this is the major cause of shoulder dents).

From left to right: 36J, 30GG and 28E straps on the Tango Beige. Thicker and wider straps for heavier sizes reduce pressure

If you have a very heavy bust then 10-20% of your bust's weight is still a lot so you'll want your straps to have features that improve your comfort. Wider bra straps disperse the pressure over a greater area and so lessen the pressure on your shoulders. Some straps are cushioned at the shoulder area to ease the pressure too (Cleo and Superbra add cushioning as standard to their heavier sizes).

2. How Far They Adjust
Besides taking some of the weight of your breasts the most important thing your straps do is adjust the fit of your cups. When you shorten your straps it brings you cups closer to your body which you need if you have one breast smaller than the other. You'll need to shorten the strap on your smaller side more so that the cup is flush with your body. This is why you must adjust your straps when you try on a new bra to assess whether the cups are the right size for you.

Lucy (L) has fully adjustable straps whereas Profile Perfect (R) has partially adjustable straps

Some bras have fully adjustable straps which means the slider can be shortened all the way to the front or lengthened all the way to the back. This is an important feature for women with long or short torsos. If a strap is only partially adjustable (can only be adjusted over half the strap - the rest of the strap may be either padded or has a design that the slider can't go over) then you may not be able to shorten it enough or lengthen it enough to fit your body.

Related Video: How Straps Affect Your Bra Fit 

3. Their Position on Your Shoulders
If you have sloping or narrow shoulders then you may find that your straps slip even though your band is the right size and keeping your bra securely in place. If the straps on a bra are positioned too far apart they can fall off your shoulders which is frustrating. Look for straps that start closer in on the shoulder if you have sloping or narrow shoulders.

Melissa (L) has wider set straps and Leopard Sucre (R) has closer set straps

Good product descriptions will include the width of the straps, whether they are cushioned and whether the strap position is good for women with narrow or sloping shoulders. When you understand which strap features matter to your comfort you can shop more confidently. xx

Directory of Full Bust Bloggers

Since I started blogging about Butterfly Collection bras and life for busty women the bra blogosphere has grown a lot! There is a wealth of diverse women writing about different breast sizes and shapes, fashion for busty and/or plus size and bra fit. To help you figure out which bloggers are right for you I've compiled a directory broken down by theme:

26-30 Band Full Bust Bloggers
These bloggers are very knowledgeable about the style, fit and comfort issues associated with being small in the band and large in the cup.
Invest in Your Chest
Curvy Wordy
Busts 4 Justice
Thin and Curvy
Le Curvy Kitten
Braless in Brazil
By Baby's Rules
Bras and Body Image
Venusian Glow
Undercover Lingerista
Quest for the Perfect Bra
A Sophisticated Pair
Miss Underpinnings
Obsessed with Breasts
Bras I Hate

32+ Band Full Bust Bloggers
These bloggers are full busted (D+ cups) and range from regular dress sizes to plus size.
Fuller Figure Fuller Bust
XL Hourglass
Fussy Busty
Bra Nightmares
The Full Figured Chest
Hourglassy

Boudoir, Sleepwear and General Lingerie Reviews
These bloggers cover lingerie not specific to the full bust market. Beautiful to look at and some pieces that work for full bust women, these bloggers are well worth checking out.
The Lingerie Addict
Sweet Nothings NYC
The Full Figured Chest
The Lingerie Lesbian

Full Bust Bra Fitting Advice
Considering that bra fit is essential for feeling comfortable and supported it's no wonder this is such a widely discussed topic. As a professional bra fitter I take this subject very seriously and I recommend these sites for their bra fitting advice.
Venusian Glow Fitting
Boosaurus Fitting
Thin and Curvy Fitting
Invest in Your Chest Fitting
Fuller Figure Fuller Bust Fitting
Braless in Brasil Fitting
Sweet Nothing NYC Fitting

Full Bust Clothing Reviews (non-plus size)
Clothing for full bust women can be very tricky. A lot of clothing isn't tailored for dramatic curves so these reviews are really helpful for working out which brands and styles work for full busts.
Thin and Curvy Clothes
Curvy Wordy 
Bras and Body Image Clothes
Bras I Hate Clothing
Hourglassy Clothing (Campbell and Kate Shirts)
Quest for a Perfect Bra Clothing
Miss Underpinnings Style
Le Curvy Kitten

Full Bust Clothing Reviews (plus-size)
If you are full busted and also a plus size woman then finding clothes can be doubly difficult sometimes. These reviewers find clothing and styles for plus sized full bust women.
Fuller Figure Fuller Bust Clothing
Curvy Wordy

I hope you find this list useful, I will update it whenever I can. There is such a wealth of knowledge out there and it can help you feel happy, confident and comfortable in your full bust life! xx

A Manifesto for Busty Women

When Mr Butterfly and I started Butterfly Collection we simply wanted to make it easier for busty Canadian and American women to find bras that fit them correctly. I couldn't have imagined that our purpose would grow into something so much more meaningful and diverse.

I want to share with you the things that I have learned about busty women since we began (despite being one for 20 years!) This is our busty manifesto; the things we stand for and strive for every day.

1. Every woman deserves to be fitted for a bra with dignity. No body shaming, no bullying and no discrimination.
2. Every woman deserves to have access to bra knowledge and expertise no matter where she lives. 
3. The size of your breasts does NOT dictate your personality. What other people assume about you based on your breasts says a lot about their personality.
4. In the right bra you are more confident, comfortable, able to play sports and dress without hiding.
5. Bra knowledge liberates you and puts you in harmony with your breasts.
6. Each woman's definition of beautiful, sexy and comfortable is different and she should have the bras that are right for her life and her definitions.
7. We have to break the cycle of pointless and cowardly breast shaming by the media, family and peers.
8. When you stop hating and hiding your body you realize how much more you and your body can do.
9. We foster self-esteem because it is fundamentally linked to bra fit for busty women.
10. No busty woman ever has to feel alone - she is part of a beautiful, passionate and powerful community.

My hope is that eventually every woman will feel and live these things. There are still thousands of busty women who struggle to feel physically and emotionally comfortable with their breasts and each one we, as a community, can help and support is another step closer to breaking the cycle of pain and shame. I know that as our community of confident and knowledgeable busty women grows we are creating a new bra and breast culture for our daughters to grow up in. Thank you for being part of this worthwhile mission xx

The Difference Between Bra Facts and Bra Preference

When you start researching bras and bra fit you quickly realize that it's a pretty huge topic. This is because boobs are as diverse and unique as the women they live on. There are lots of different bra blogs out there and they all have different information depending on their personal style, breast shape and lifestyle. It can be confusing to know which information is right for you.

In general the information breaks down into two groups. Firstly there are facts about what good bra fit looks and feels like; this information is pretty much non-negotiable. Secondly there are bra preferences like style, shape, colour and comfort levels. There are no right or wrongs in the bra preferences, it's totally down to the individual. To help you decipher the must-know bra facts from bra preferences I've put together a quick cheat's list:

Bra Facts

1. All your breast tissue (including that squidgy bit at your armpit that you think is fat) should sit inside the cup.
2. Your bra band should stay in place and not ride up your back.
3. Bra straps should not slip off and should not dig in.
4. A new bra should fit you on the loosest set of hooks first (unless it's a maternity bra)
5. Your gore (the part between your breasts) should be flush with your body.

Bra Preferences

1. Whether you prefer to wear a balconette bra, a plunge, a full cup or a wire-free. There are no hard and fast rules about what you have to wear (other than wearing a sports bra when active)
2. How tight your band has to be. Some women prefer a really tight band, others like it just firm and some prefer to have it as loose as it can go without compromising fit (as soon as it starts to ride up then your band is too loose).
3. Shape - some women love rounded cups or lots of cleavage, some like a more minimized look. Whatever shape you like you can find bras that will give you that look.
4. Price - There is no right price to pay for a bra, it depends on what you're comfortable paying for the amount of wear you will get out of it. A well constructed bra that is worn and cared for well should last between 8 and 18 months (depending on how often you wear it).
5. Style - There are lots of different styles of bras that fit different breast shapes differently. Working out your breast shape will really help you work out which bra bloggers have reviews that are relevant to your shape. Check out Bratabase's Breast Shape Gallery.

Once you have the bra facts nailed down you can start to explore the bra preferences that suit your body and personal style. When you find bras that tick all the boxes on the bra facts list and have all the things you're looking for in your bra preferences you have found your bra sweet spot! xx

Why Some Bras Will Never Fit You

Lots of women will say they know their bra size but can never find a bra that fits. Two things are usually going on here; either they really don't know their size (most commonly their band is too big and causing the bra to move around) or they keep trying on the same style of bra. The shape of your bust and the density of your breast tissue means that some bra styles simply will never fit you. Don't despair though, knowing which styles work for your breasts and give you the look you're after the easier it will be to find the right bras.

Related Article: How age affects your bra fit.

Lots of women have only ever tried on bras at big lingerie retailers like La Senza and Victoria's Secret. They try their correct size (rare for the full bust women in these places but not impossible) and find that the bras don't fit them. The problem here is that the majority of bras in these stores are molded styles and despite all the colours and trims, they are all based on just a few design patterns. If this pattern of molded cup doesn't fit your shape then it doesn't matter which size you try on, it will never feel quite right.

Molded Bras Aren't Your Only Option
It's important to break out of a one style trap and try several different styles of bra in your size so you can figure out which ones feels the best and gives you the shape you're after. I know that molded cups are so popular because they offer a smooth look under t-shirts and disguise your nipples but you can get these benefits from other styles too.

Delphi is a seamed bra with the discretion of a molded cup

Most seamed bras have flat, discreet seams that aren't noticeable under clothing. Some seamed bras are made of light foam material that disguises your nipples like a molded cup but aren't as rigid so fit to your shape better (Delphi and Medina are great examples of this style).

Related Video: How Seams Affect Your Bra Shape

Which Bra Styles are Available for Full Busts?
It's a good idea to try out bras in lots of different styles (make sure you know your size range first). Here are the most common full bust styles:

Full Cup Bras have full coverage so they come up higher on your breasts and tend not to emphasize your cleavage. This style gives a lot of stability and many women choose to wear this style during the day when they are busiest as the support is comfortable and reliable.

Serenade is a full cup bra because it encases the whole breast

Molded Bras have either a rigid or soft cup (they both seamless, the rigid cups are usually a little thicker). Molded bras can be very supportive and give a lovely shape. Just be aware that rigid cups can't bend to your shape, your breasts have to form to the shape of the cups rather than vice versa.

Profile Perfect is a soft molded cup so the cup can form to your body more easily

Vertical Seamed Bras combine the best of both worlds; the flexibility of the softer cups with the support and shape of seams. Vertical seamed bras can give lots of lift and accentuate cleavage.

A vertically seamed bra like Medina gives you lift and accentuated cleavage

Balconnete bras have a wider neckline and are lower at the front than a full cup bra. They are often seamed with three or four sections to give your breasts shape and support. An ideal solution for lots of women who want support without too much material or bulk.

A balconette bra like Lucy gives you the support of seams with a less full cup and wider neckline

Before you decide that bras simply don't fit you make sure you have explored all the options that are out there for you. Besides the ones listed above there are plunge, strapless, multi-way, wirefree, sports bras, nursing, mastectomy and vintage styles like cone bras. The style of bra can make a huge difference to your comfort, for example, if you're short, look for bras with straps that are fully adjustable (like Lucy from Cleo) or if you have sloping shoulders look for styles with the straps closer together (like Dessous Neon from Claudette). Your bra should be working with you, not against you.

If you have a particular question about which styles are right for your body you can email your details to support@butterflycollection.ca or use our Free Size Consultation. xx

The Shame of Big Boobs: Claudia's Story

The contents of this blog post are from an email I received from a woman who wanted to share her story of life in big boobs. I am always so touched when women get in touch to say that they want to help other women come to terms with and feel proud of their boobs. If Claudia's story reaches just one woman feeling ashamed of her breasts and helps her feel like she's not alone then it's a wonderful gift. My personal thanks to Claudia xx

Claudia's Story 
My name is Claudia, I’m a 25-year-old Italian girl and my adventure in bra-fitting began six months ago. When I came across your site by chance, I instantly fell in love. The passion you put in what do you is palpable in every word. I felt the urge to share my story with you and your readers because maybe it can help other women who are experiencing what I went through until not too long ago.

After years of being stuck in the wrong size and loathing for my boobs I ultimately decided to get a breast reduction. Since then, my life has changed. I now share your understanding of how important a good fitting is for women with big boobs.

A Child in a Grown-up Body
Ever since I hit puberty, I’ve had big boobs. They developed so fast that at the age of 11 I needed to buy my first bra. I was still a child, even though my body had suddenly decided to change and move into woman territory. I was shocked, I was ashamed, my boobs were my enemies, because I was the only one among my friends and classmates with “those things” and, mostly, I wasn’t ready for the strange stares that started coming my way, often from men the age of my dad and often followed by rude, offensive comments. I would have done everything to hide that unwanted presence that kept growing on my chest.

At the age of 20 my breasts stopped their development and I ended up with what I used to call “my ginormous, ugly boobs”, which were a nightmare to dress, carry around, live with, and totally disproportionate compared to my otherwise petite body. Men kept ogling at them whenever I went, I even received inappropriate looks/comments from other women, sports were a problem, the idea of going to the beach almost made me cry and jeez, they were heavy! Bra shopping? A living hell, a dreadful, humiliating, frustrating experience.

The Nightmare of Bra Shopping
When I bought my first bra, and up until relatively recently, every store only had sizes that went from 1 to 4, sometimes 5. These numbers are the old-fashioned Italian bra sizing system, 1 means “very small breasts AND ribcage measurement”, size 5 means “OMG you’re boobs are huge and so must be your band size”, and everything in between. If you wanted something bigger than size 5, you had to visit a specialized store, where the styles were for your grandmother, cost a fortune, and big cups were only on big bands. A few years ago the number/letter system reached Italy, but even now only a couple of brands offer a decent range of sizes. For the record, they don’t fit me and I must shop online.

I knew big cup/big band bras clearly weren’t a good fit – they didn’t stay in place, offered no support and uplift, my boobs spilled over the top and the sides, wires poked here and there, straps dug into my shoulders – but I kept buying and wearing them because they were the only pretty bras I could find. I can’t even begin to count how many saleswomen have looked at me like I was some kind of alien, with either a pitying or a you’re-so-damn-lucky expression. I definitely didn’t think of myself as lucky, I envied the small-busted girls who could find tons of lovely bras and didn’t have to hide their boobs, but I totally understood the pitying stares. If you live in a world where big boob stereotypes are everywhere and you can’t find bras, swimwear and clothes that are good for you, self-loathing and shame are an easy mistake. And when “bra fitting” is a meaningless concept, no one teaches you that it’s not your fault if manufacturers are ignorant, that a 32-38 A-D range is extremely limited, that the “plus 4” method is wrong… well, being stuck in the wrong size for years is even easier.

The Consequences of Bad Bras
I spent more than 10 years of my life blaming myself and my curves, torturing my boobs with horrendously ill-fitting bras and thinking there was something wrong with me. The consequences, of course, didn’t only affect me emotionally; wearing bras that were too big in the band and too small in the cups also had a major impact on my posture, breast tissue (aka migration) and health, the lack of proper support leading to severe neck, shoulder and back pain.

Two years ago I decided I’d had enough, and finally found the courage to have the reduction I’d been dreaming of for a long time. To make it short: surgery went well, my boobs were still big but proportional to my body and I was extremely pleased with the result. Do I regret it now? More on this later.

Being at Peace with my Boobs
So… I didn’t hate my boobs anymore (I loved them, actually), but unfortunately I kept wearing the wrong size for the same reasons as before. Things changed six months ago, when for the first time I considered the option of online shopping; deep inside of me I knew there had to be pretty, not too expensive bras for big-busted women. I Googled a few keywords and… discovered a whole new world. I learned how sizing works; that you don’t have to add inches to your underbust measurement to determine your band size; that DD+ cups really exist and no, it’s nothing scary; that yes, I can find pretty and sexy bras in my size; how to tell if a bra is a good fit or not. All this, and much more.

I will NEVER forget the feeling of wearing a well-fitting bra for the first time. So supportive and comfortable! And what an amazing silhouette! I looked thinner because my boobs were where they are supposed to be and not near my navel, I could lift my arms up and bend over without worry because they were perfectly encased in the cups. No more back rolls, no more discomfort, no more quadraboob. My posture? I couldn’t believe the difference.

Back to my breast reduction… I don’t regret it. I decided to have surgery for many reasons and one of them is that in spite of everything I didn’t like my boobs, aesthetically speaking. I’m happier now, I think they better suit my body. But all that self-loathing, the frustration, having to deal with constant pain? Ah, if only I had well-fitting bras back then, if only proper bra fitting was common knowledge! I would have chosen to have a reduction nevertheless, but I’m sure my journey toward self-confidence and acceptance of my curves would have been easier. And this is the point I’m trying to make with my overly long story. Wearing the right bra has been a total life changer for me and I took the matter to heart; I keep reading as much as I can on bra fitting, I try to educate women, and I have a dream: a world where no woman is ashamed of her boobs because of stupid myths and thinks she’s a freak just because she needs bras in sizes that aren’t always available due to manufacturer’s ignorance. Not all body image issues would be magically resolved, of course, because self-confidence is a complex thing. But it would be an important achievement nonetheless.

Shopping and Happiness for Busty Teens

Last week we looked at the role of family members in supporting their teen girls about bras and breasts. Thank you to everyone who got in touch to say that the piece struck a chord with their own experiences.

Top Five Things Busty Women Wished They'd Known as Teens
I asked our lovely readers on Facebook and Twitter what they wish they'd known about bras when they were growing up. Here are the top 5 things that came up:

1) How to figure out my size
2) That bras don't stop at a D cup
3) The right size bra doesn't hurt
4) Your bra size changes throughout your life
5) Not to be ashamed of being busty

In this conclusion to the Guide for Parents of Busty Daughters I want to share some practical tips about shopping for bras with your daughter and preparing her for a life with big boobs.

First Bra Shopping Trip
Lots of girls won't realize that they need a bra and so it's important that parents are paying attention to the physical changes in their daughters and don't shy away from the subject just because they can't believe they're growing up - ignoring it won't make it any less true.

Buying bras will possibly be part of her life forever so her first bra shopping trip is a rite of passage. Use this significant event to bond over the 'occasion' of your daughter growing up. Make time for the trip, don't throw a Wal-mart training bra in the cart while picking up groceries. Giving your daughter a sense that her breasts are worth taking care of properly (not as an after thought) will set the tone for her bra shopping attitude.

Viva is a great option for school as it's supportive, pretty and discreet

Age Appropriate Bras
Unless your daughter has a very sudden growth spurt it's unlikely that her very first bra will be a D-K cup. However, don't underestimate how quickly your daughter's bust can change. Many teens need 28-30 backs with D+ cups. I know these are harder to find (which is why I set up Butterfly Collection in the first place) but teaching your daughter that finding the right fit is worthwhile is a great gift. Keeping your daughter in great fitting bras through her breast development will also improve her health and self-esteem.

Bras for teens is different from lingerie for women, in my opinion. Buying sexy, fun and exotic underwear is something wonderful for adult women, however, 11, 12, 13 etc is a time you should still be able to be a kid and have the right support so that you can be active and confident. Here are some tips about age appropriate bras.

Lucy from Cleo is a wonderfully supportive bra that is fun and teen appropriate

Colour/Pattern - For school it's important to have something that is supportive and discreet so basic colours like black, skin-toned (this can be tough to find for all skin-tones but things are changing) and white are useful. Being young doesn't mean your underwear can't be fun. Fun is different from sexy. It breaks my heart to see 12 year olds in leopard print plunge bras because you have so much time as an adult to consider your sexual side, but you have so little time to just be a kid. I think Cleo has some great age appropriate bras in bright colours, fun pattern and mostly importantly, good support.

Stretch lace panels like this one on Faye from Freya allows for some size fluctuation as your daughter develops

Shape - When your body is changing you need as much support as you can get. To make your dollar go further look for bras with a quantity of stretch lace in the cup. This will give your daughter some growing room. Three part bras (bras where the cups are made of three pieces of material rather than one) are good for increased support.

A good sports bra, like this one from Enell can keep your daughter participating in sports. A great investment in her health.

Sports - EVERY girl should have a sports bra. I know these can be a little more expensive but you are investing in the longevity of her health and that's worth it. Ensuring that your daughter has the right support to participate in sport is vital for a healthy body, mind and relationship with her breasts.

Preparing Your Daughter for Being a Busty Girl
Whether you were a busty teen or not you probably have memories of kids teasing you. Busty women remember being teased or leered after by boys and being called names and teased by smaller busted girls. Being busty can make you feel like an outsider. Giving your daughter the right bras will eliminate the physical discomfort many busty teens experience but you also need to give her the emotional tools to deal with the other stuff.

I asked my Mum how she prepared for having busty daughters (with her own award-winning bust it was highly likely that my sister or I - or both - would have a larger bust). She said "You can't stop other people being idiots, you can only prepare your daughter to know how to spot one." This is the key. Your daughter needs to know that if other people feel the need to comment on her bust then that's their problem and not hers.

Self-Esteem
This is one of the most important things I write about. If you feel happy, confident and worthy then it really doesn't matter what anyone thinks of your shape. Self-esteem is the bedrock of allowing your daughter to concentrate on being her rather than searching for a manufactured way to fit in. If she's busty the chances are she'll always be busty so the sooner she comes to love her body, the longer she'll be happy.

One of our readers once commented "I am proud to be me because of and despite of my bust." I love this comment because it sums up great self-esteem. You don't have to hide your bust and you don't have to be defined by it. Helping your daughter to love the uniqueness and beauty of her body alongside the fabulousness of her actions, thoughts and talents is the key to balance.

I hope these two blog posts have given you some ideas for making life easier and happier for your busty teens. Boobs are a life-long journey and as with all things, if you get a good start the journey is so much easier. xx

Customer Experience: I've Stopped Being Ashamed of my Chest

This week I'm handing you over to my wonderful sister-in-law who has very kindly written about her experience of having her first bra fitting. I can tell you what a difference the right bra will make, but nothing is as good as hearing a first hand account of going from limp, uninspiring, badly-fitting bras to a joyful over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder like the Sunshine Yellow Lucy bra above...

Fear of the Unknown
I had barely finished expressing my dread for an impending bra shopping expedition when Mrs. Butterfly flicked her head towards the back room and asked, “Do you want to pop around for a quick fitting?” I got the distinct impression that she had been waiting for the first possible opportunity to get her tape measure around me! I didn’t know what to expect because I’ve never been fitted for a bra before, however had I known the outcome, I would have sought her counsel a very long time ago.

Boob Hiding Tactics
I realize now that from the onset of my very early developing years to my fitting with Mrs. Butterfly, I never got past the awkward teenage stage where all you want to do is pretend your breasts don’t exist. I have spent the last twenty years of my life trying to hide my boobs.

A grey hoodie goes a long way to hiding your shape

I'd hunched, covered my chest with strategically placed scarves, I wore bulky sweaters in the sweltering heat of Australian summers and basically did anything I could think of to hide myself however possible. I spent a lot of time wishing that I didn’t have boobs, which is a great shame for a woman. One fitting with Claire at Butterfly Collection changed everything!

I didn't know my boobs until now
At first I was anxious about taking my top off in front of someone but Claire’s professionalism put me at ease in seconds and the actual measuring was the work of a few moments. She handed me a bra to try on, and nothing about the way I carry myself has been the same since.

When I clasped on my first bra, that actually fit me the way a bra is supposed to fit, I had an epiphany!  I didn’t hate my boobs! I just hated my boobs in the wrong bra!  When I shopped for bras by myself I set myself an imaginary size threshold that I would refuse to cross because then I would be admitting how big my boobs were. I thought that by wearing a bra with a smaller letter cup my boobs would look smaller (this doesn't work obviously!).  So imagine my surprise to find that in the correct bra, my boobs actually looked smaller!

My outfit with new bra from Butterfly Collection at the wedding of Mr and Mrs Butterfly!

I purchased three bras from Butterfly Collection after my fitting and have little doubt that before too long I will probably have more bras than Butterfly Collection's stock room. My new found bra enthusiasm is about more than just the comfort of wearing the right bra. It’s about how the right bra makes me look and the changes I feel, which then changes how I carry myself and how others see me.  Because of Claire, I am sure people think that I have grown an extra three inches since I am walking with a much straighter back these days.

If you have ever felt the way that I have about your large boobs, and you are on the fence about reaching out to Butterfly Collection because of any level of embarrassment or shame you think you might have, then I implore you to just bite the bullet and do it before you have the chance to talk yourself out of it.  You have nothing to lose but ill-fitting bras and reasons to hide.

12 MORE Must-Read Boobilicious Blogs

We had a fantastic response to our original 12 Must-Read Boobilicious Blogs post. It's so exciting to see that people want to know more about their bra size and options as well as breast health and fashion for busty women. In the last six months since the original 12 post there have been even more new blogs talking about the quest for great bra fit and fashion. 

http://missunderpinnings.com/
This is one of my new favourites written by a North American blogger (we need more of these please!) On the search for small back, larger cup bras as well as the fashion to flatter her shape, this blog is easy to read, uplifting (in more ways than one) and gives you some good ideas.

http://boosaurusbras.blogspot.ca/
This blog only came on my radar earlier this year and has already made a big impact. Christine, the author, is passionate about good bra fit, easy to relate to and a bit of a geek - which I love!! I highly recommend checking out her blog.

http://curvywordy.blogspot.ca/
A new-ish UK blogger, Curvy Wordy has a great writing style and covers a lot more than just the bras. She's eloquent about her struggles without being a Moaning Minnie (sorry, but some bloggers just vent and that gets dull fast - Curvy Wordy is definitely not that!) This blog is always chock-full of good pics too!

http://thelingerieaddict.com/
Considered by many to be the Godmother of Lingerie, The Lingerie Addict is a mecca of lingerie knowledge and passion. Headed by Treacle, the original addict, this blog has information for buyers, sellers and designers alike. A must-have in your lingerie list.

http://voluptuouslythin.wordpress.com/
This blog is almost brand-spanking new but I have to include it because it shows such promise and made me super excited that young American women are getting involved in the bra conversation. Izzy is just 17 and yet she already knows that she's been short changed in the bra department. As a 32HH she wants to spread the word to other young women and improve bra knowledge in the US - HALLELUIAH!!!!!

http://cleavagechronicles.blogspot.ca/
This is the blog for Presenza, the brand behind a line of bust-friendly wrap blouses. The brainchild of Jill Homiak this blog has fashion and style tips for busty women of all proportions.

https://swimwearandlingerie.wordpress.com/
Written by the lovely Maggie (here in Canada no less!) you are always guaranteed to learn, giggle and empathize when reading her blog. Maggie is also a tireless supporter of lingerie bloggers, retweeting them whenever humanly possible.

http://busts4justice.com/
Busts 4 Justice is the home of one of my bra heroines, Beckie, who single-handedly brought Marks and Spencer's to their knees on national TV and admit that big busts need to be treated more fairly. She is a fantastic advocate for good bra advice, sizing and offerings. I was lucky to be interviewed by Beckie last year about my mission for Butterfly Collection and large breasted Canadians! In my head she wears a cape all the time!

http://hourglassy.com/
Hourglassy is the blog for Campbell and Kate, designers and makers of classic white button-down shirts for larger breasted women. Darlene is a passionate writer who understands the life and wants of a busty woman. Her journey as both business owner and busty clothing magician is absolutely worth the read.

http://kel-kitty.blogspot.ca/
Three things to know about this lady - She has fantastic style, amazing hair and a killer personality - if that doesn't make you want to read her blog then you're like stone! A UK blogger, this young and vibrant blogger has heaps of fashion picks for busty women and lots of knowledge about what constitutes good fit. Check her out!

http://bybabysrules.com

They say a good blog is defined by a unique voice and I think an ex-military, bra loving, dog owner counts as a unique voice! You'll find small band and big cup reviews as well as general bra questions and a passion for great fit!
http://guilty-pleasures.org/
Guilty pleasure is a compendium of great lingerie articles and blogs from the unique and lovely Miss Tique as well as designers and other lingerie experts. Whether you're looking for some sports bras advice or reviews of the most exquisite luxury French designers, Guilty Pleasures will have something for you.

Well that's my 12 extra blogs for you - I hope you see some faves and some new ones in there. Let me know if I've missed your favourite xx

Holly Jackson: How to Deal with Cup Size Shock

 

I've recently managed to convince several people to get measured through Twitter and the power of friendship, and some of them have come back to me feeling very unsettled after finding out their new bra size. I can sympathize since I recently lost some weight and changed sizes to…a 32J (and by the way Internet, I have not yet collapsed due to the weight of my own breasts!)

Several of my friends used a good bra calculator and had similar revelations. A good friend of mine found out more about her bra size; she previously thought her bra size was 38G and she turned out to be a 36L. The calculator also gave her the American size translation which made her a 36R in US sizes, this seemed even more of a shock! She was understandably freaked out. Suddenly, her whole life was different. She asked lots of questions that I think about too. If she got pregnant, how would she find nursing bras? If she lost weight would her breast size go down or up? Where in the world did a person buy L cup bras anyway? She was truly upset. Her body, as she understood it, was different than it was before the calculator, and she was now in a category of cup size that can make life difficult.

I tried to be practical and soothe her, but honestly, I feel the same way sometimes. Life was much easier when I was a G cup (even if my bras didn't fit as well). I could wear all kinds of bras and felt like I had tons of choice. As we learn more and cup sizes increase worldwide, G is starting to be more accepted in terms of being a normal cup size. Unfortunately, if you're above that the market hasn't caught up as fast. I find myself staring at websites and wondering where I fit in now that I've found my new size.

If you're struggling with the acceptance phase of finding out you're on the larger end of full bust sizing, here are some quick tips to help you along.

1. You're not alone.
Many women are in the same boat, whether you know it or not. Happily, many women are also blogging openly about their experiences, and lots of wonderful communities have formed around these blogs. Find one you like, and join in. You'll learn things, and even make some like-boobed friends in the process.

2. Tell retailers that you exist.
If we want the market to change, this is what we have to do. In the age of the internet, people are easier to contact than ever. Use that to your advantage and contact retailers and ask why they don't carry your bra size. Small boutiques like Butterfly tend to be more responsive to things like this, but even big retailers have made changes based on widespread internet campaigns.

3. Speak with your wallet.
If someone carries your size, make sure you buy from them. Sometimes this means paying a little bit extra, but that extra is exactly like voting with your wallet. One of the issues that brands face when they want to make larger cup sizes is finding an audience, so make sure you're showing them they have one.

4. Don't be afraid to talk about it.
I once convinced someone to get measured and into a bra that fit on a train trip from New York to Philadelphia. It all started with her awkwardly asking me what my bra size was, and the fact that I was willing to reveal it helped her accept her own full bust figure. I'm not suggesting that you start walking around with a name tag with your bra size on it, but if we don't tell people that larger cup sizes exist people won't realize that they do. Most people don't know that J, K, or L cups exist! By getting measured and 'owning' your size we can change the mental image of full bust women and make bra manufacturers take notice of us.

Don't Hate on The Tape Measure!

Over the last couple of weeks a press release about measuring for bra size has been doing the rounds. The University of Plymouth research suggests that using a tape measure leads to inaccurate bra size results, however, nowhere in any of the articles I've read does it say what measurements people were taking or what they were doing with them. It's yet another half story that does more bra harm than good!

What's the Rest of the Story?!
Maybe I agree with this research, maybe I don't but I need more info to find out. Is it suggesting that using a tape measure to find your band size then adding inches to the measurement gives you inaccurate results? If so I agree wholeheartedly. Is it suggesting that trying to find your bra size by wrapping a tape measure around your back then pulling it up through your armpits and resting on your sternum is about as effective as measuring your feet to find your hat size? Then I say Hurrah! But nowhere does it say how the tape measure is being used, it just takes a cheap shot at the humble tape measure.

I hear and read people deriding the tape measure all the time. The common retort is that getting fitted in-store is the best solution. Of course a good bra fitter is a wonderful thing to have but MILLIONS of women do not have access to a good bra fitter (working in a store doesn't automatically make you a good fitter). Not having access to a physical store does not mean you have to languish in a painful bra. With a tape measure and good bra knowledge, you're well on your way to finding your own best fit!

The Five Step Check to Fit
The recent research promotes that a 5 step approach to fit is the best way to find your size and I absolutely agree, however, I don't think this is an either or scenario - the tape measure can help you get a perfect 5 step fit a good deal faster if you use it correctly.


No matter how you get measured for a bra the Fit Check still applies. You can walk yourself through the Five Fit Checks and work out if your bra fits you.


1) All of your breast tissue must sit inside the cup. This includes the breast tissue at the sides, top and middle - it all wants to be inside the cup! If you're spilling you need a bigger cup. If the cup is baggy, you need a smaller one.

2) Your band should be snug which means it stays securely in place around your body without pinching you. If your band is too loose your bra will move causing you discomfort. If your band is too tight, it hurts!

3) The gore (the centre part at the front) needs to lie flat against your body without poking into you. If the gore doesn't lie flat it means either your band is too big or your cups are too small.

4)  Straps should not dig into your shoulders, if they do then it's likely your band is too big. Your band takes the majority of your boobs' weight so if it's not supportive enough your straps (and consequently your shoulders) end up taking the strain.

5) Your band should be horizontal with the floor all the way around your body and there should be no gaps between your body and the band (if there are your band or your cups are too big).

If you listen closely you'll hear your boobs screaming for help!

Your Bra Doesn't Fit - 
Now What?
So you've gone through the 5 fit checks and worked out that your 34C bra is not your friend. You know you need to come down in the band and up in the cup. The question remains - how many band sizes do I come down? I've fitted women who arrived in a 38D and left in a 32GG - it would take a great deal of trial and error to arrive at this final destination by yourself without a tape measure.


I am by no means suggesting that a tape measure system is 100% accurate, but used correctly it can give you a great starting point to know which sizes to begin with. Once you try on your suggested size it's then easier to use the 5 Fit Checks to work out if your size needs tweaking - "This band fits but I need a bigger cup" or "this cup fits but the band is too loose so I'll go down in the band and up in the cup to keep the same cup volume".

Stop Blaming Women and Tape Measures!
I despise the '85% of women are in the wrong bra' stat because it suggests women are to blame for being in the wrong bra and they're not - fitters and manufacturers have a lot to answer for. Lots of women have been badly fitted by 'experts', many cannot find their actual bra size in a store near them and lots of women simply are never told that bra sizes extend beyond the 32-38 A-D range.

Women have been given misleading and confusing information for decades and understanding bra fit needn't be complicated. By measuring around your ribcage and using that as your starting band size your margin for error is lessened. Measuring around the fullest part of your bust to work out your cup size is not perfect but again it's a starting point from which you can effectively use the 5 Fit Checks.

The Butterfly Collection Bra Calculator
I have debated for a long time whether we should have a Bra Calculator. The very term has become synonymous with online torture generators like the Playtex US calculator. However, I know that women are more than capable of understanding their own bra size when given the right tools and knowledge to figure it out. So after a great deal of thought, here is the Butterfly Collection Bra Calculator!

We'd love your feedback!

How is our Calculator Different?
The objective behind our calculator is to give you a good starting size from which you can work out which fit is right for you. We've added some features you don't see on other calculators:

1. We've included results based on personal preference. Some women prefer a really tight band and some prefer a slightly looser one. We've included these size results for you too.
   
2. We use the UK sizing system on our site because most of our brands are British. However, many women are used to the North American sizes so we've also included a column that shows your size translated into North American sizing for reference.

Your Help Please
I'm prepared for some backlash on this project because whenever you put something in black and white someone is going to question you laying down the law. I know this calculator won't work for everyone. It will be very inaccurate for A-C cup women because we don't sell A-C cup bras. It won't work for women who need the plus four method to offset an athletic build, protruding sternums and close-set breasts.

However, I do want to make this a useful and empowering tool for women 28-38 D-K and to do that I need your feedback. If you take a spin in our calculator please leave a comment on this blog about how the results worked out for you and what you would like to see improved, it would be a great help!

Calculators should never be used in isolation, understanding which bra styles work for you as well as which brands fit you best all contribute to getting your valuable assets into a fabulous bra that's right for you! xx

Why are Women Afraid to Break the D-Cup Barrier?

Ask a big busted woman wearing a comfortable, correctly fitting bra if she cares about her cup size and she'll probably laugh. When you have a bust that needs daily support being in the right size bra is essential. So why are so many women afraid to feel the joy of a correctly fitting bra simply because that bra has a cup size over a D?

The fear of being a D+ cup size stems from a lack of education around bras. We've been brought up to believe that A-D are the regulation bust sizes - anything above that is excessive, unnecessary and probably pornographic. This dogma is so ingrained in society that it's almost impossible to find D+ bras on the high street (Victoria's Secret, La Senza etc all stop at a DD). What does that say to you when you're a busty teenager trying to shop for your 30G boobs? "You're a freak, you don't fit in, you need to conform."

In an effort to keep the status quo but accommodate some of these unforeseen big busted gals, bra manufacturers began making DD then DDD bras. Now I don't know who thought having a bra size called triple D was easier than saying F cup but that guy was smoking something funky. Why was it such a problem to use the rest of the alphabet? The introduction of DD and DDD sizes came in the 1950s when boobs were still something to keep under lock and key. I can only assume that to call these oversized bazoomas E and F would have caused men to spontaneously combust so it was just safer to stay in the D-zone. Women have been brain-washed into thinking that big boobs are for wanton women and that stigma stays with us today.

I'm afraid some women are not helping in quashing this man-made stereotype either (the letter system was introduced by a man). The number of times women have commented how fake my boobs are to her husband in not so hushed tonesnever fails to amaze me. I was particularly saddened the other day when I read on a forum a 19 year old asking for help finding bras in a G cup. The comments ranged from catty to down right offensive and I can only assume that those women lack a great deal of self-confidence so have to bring others down.

It's time for us to reclaim the rest of the alphabet and recognize that cup letters are proportional to our body size. I think the photo below from Brittany at Thin and Curvy, shows that your band size has everything to do with proportionality.

Being proud of your body and knowing how to dress it well starts with wearing the right bra size. It is quite literally the foundation of your style and confidence. If you know you are languishing in a giant-banded D cup bra simply because you have D+ fear I invite you to call us and let us help you find your real size 1-888-225-0474 or use our Bra Size Calculator to find your best starting point. Living your life in the right bra is a liberating experience. xx