Big Boob Phobia!

I am afraid of clowns. I think they have machetes in their trouser-legs and they kill people who go to the circus. The logical side of my brain says there's probably a very small percentage of weapon-wielding, murderous funny-men but nonetheless I feel like crying when I see one. Perhaps the reason so many women have hang-ups about wearing a bra over a D cup is that they are actually suffering from Pectorusgiganticus; Fear of Big Boobs! (a word I just made up, naturally.)

Joking aside, it never ceases to amaze me how many women are afraid of bra letters over a D cup. It makes no difference what label you put on the ratio between your breast mass and your ribcage measurement (sexy right, that's what your bra size refers to) your boobs are still going to be that volume. Letter Phobia doesn't stop your boobs are spilling out of your bra or bouncing around so it's worthwhile getting educated about bra fit and what bra sizes actually mean.

Over several decades we have built up layers of phobias around boobs; women with big boobs are bimbos or promiscuous and they can't play sports or be pain-free. These phobias stem partly from a misogynistic language that keeps women feeling guilty about their bodies (but that's a topic for a whole other dissertation!) and partly from years of dreadful bra fitting knowledge. By fitting knowledge I don't just mean getting a good fitting at a boutique, I mean, being educated about bras.

As we grow up we're educated about periods, why we have them and what to do to manage them as they happen. Imagine never being told why you have periods or how a tampon should feel and work if used correctly. You'd spend your life blindly buying what you thought was best for you and wondering the whole time if there was something wrong with you. This is what we do to young girls about bras. We don't explain that bras should fit snugly at the band, how your cup size is relative to your band size and that breast sizes change regularly (every couple of weeks for some women). If we gave them this knowledge then the phobias around bras would begin to fade away.

It's such an old-fashioned idea that only a professional fitter can tell you about your boobs and bras. Your doctor gives you advice about how to live well (good diet, exercise etc) they don't just prescribe you antacid every time you have heartburn without ever explaining that cutting out fatty foods will stop the problem in the first place. Similarly a good bra-fitter should teach you about your fit, your breast shape, which styles work for you and how to keep an eye on your size. This way you'll understand your breasts and bras and there will be no room for phobia.

I think a lot of women worry that wearing a cup size over a D cup will make them look like they have big boobs. The reality is that a correctly fitting bra will make you look much more contained which makes your boobs look smaller than when they're bashing together somewhere near your waist!

If you think you might be suffering from Pectorusgiganticus then I want you to remember 3 things to try and overcome your phobia:

1) No one else needs to know your bra size so what difference does it make?
2) In the right size bra you won't bounce around or spill out of your cups (the two things that draw the kind of attention that can make you feel uncomfortable)
3) You can take your time but try to keep a piece of your mind open to the possibility that a different bra size could make you feel physically and emotionally better.

To every one of our customers and every reader of this blog I want you to know that you are changing the landscape for future generations of women. By educating yourselves about great bra fit you can pass on that gift and ensure that no-one has to suffer the terrible fear of Big Boobs!! xx

The Price for Chasing Perfection

"I wish I had her boobs; they're so perfect and my boobs are so big and ugly." This is part of a conversation I heard between two young women (late teens early 20s) as they thumbed through a magazine. My heart sank at this statement because it felt like such a waste. This young woman, like millions of others, will spend a good portion of her life chasing a perfection that doesn't exist and the price will be missing out on the beauty and brilliance of her body today. That feels like a waste.

There's no one definition of perfect which makes it even more illusive; how will you know when you have the perfect body, hair, boobs, skin, wardrobe, home, job etc? The commonly held idea that the perfect body looks a certain way doesn't account for whether that body is healthy or happy. There's no hairstyle or waist size on earth that defines health or happiness.  

All these women were told at some point that they didn't have 'the perfect look'. They refused to change their appearance and remained perfectly them.

Big boobs often come under fire for being 'too big' and I've never understood what that means. Too big to be happy or beautiful or athletic or intelligent? I loathe seeing bodies being compared "Are small boobs better than big ones" or "Are skinny bodies better than curvy ones?" It's just so meaningless. It doesn't achieve anything to compare these things it only focuses us on the things that we aren't rather than celebrating the things that we are. When we compare ourselves to a mythical version of perfection we feel lessened. Less than perfect, less than right, just less. How is that helpful?

I wanted to shake the girl on the Skytrain who was berating her healthy, unique and beautiful breasts and say "Do you know how lucky you are? Do you know what it means to lose a breast, to live without a limb or to battle daily with physical pain? Be thankful you have the one perfection you could ever wish for; a body in perfect working order." I know this sounds like old lady preaching but it's so true. We waste so much time worrying about the things we aren't and this means we miss out on enjoying being us, being happy and being now.

This subject was particularly important to me this weekend because Remembrance Sunday is a time I remember friends I have lost both in and out of the military and the bottom line is... life's too short to worry about your size or shape. So let's stop waiting for the perfect backside or perfect boobs and get on with living our lives with joy in the perfectly wonderful and diverse bodies we have. xx

Are You Wearing Your Bra Too Low?

When your cup isn't filled at the bottom you're probably wearing your bra too low on your body

I see a lot of women wearing their bras too low on their body. This is something that can make you uncomfortable and leave you wondering why no bras ever fit you. With this simple piece of information you can check whether your bras actually fit you much better than you thought.

Finding a bra that is the right size and style for you is fantastic but if you put your bra on too low then you may never know you have the right bra. Your bra is on too low if you have empty bra at the bottom of your cup. The easiest way to check this is to stand side-on to a mirror and look for unfilled bra cup underneath your breast.  By ensuring that your wires are flush with the bottom of your breast you are making the most of your cup volume and can prevent your boobs from spilling out of the top of your cups.

FERN BRA Left: The breast is bubbling over because the cup isn't completely full. Right: The breast is encased and the cup is full

The Curse of the Front Fasteners
One of the most common causes of wearing your bra too low is if you're a front fastener. If you fasten your bra at your front and swizzle the bra around your body then you have to pull the bra up your body and many women don't pull their bra up high enough so part of their bra is left literally unfulfilled!

How to Fill Your Cup When You're A Front Fastener
Once you have twisted your bra around to the front and pulled the straps onto your shoulders get hold of the ends of the wires of one cup (left or right it doesn't matter) and pull upwards until you feel or see that your breast is at the bottom of the cup. Repeat on the other side. You may need to adjust your straps. Don't forget to sweep your breasts away from your armpits to ensure that all your breast tissue is inside the cups.

How to Fill Your Cup When You're A Back Fastener
As you lean forward to lower your breasts into the cups pull the band towards the bottom of your breasts before fastening your bra to ensure your breasts are right at the bottom of the cups. When you stand back up check that your breasts are filling the bottom of the cup.

Exception to the Rule
Some women have one breast higher than the other (the bottom of the breasts is literally higher on one side of the body than the other) and this causes the bottom of your cup to be empty on one side but not the other. This is totally normal. The most important thing is that your breasts are encased at the top so if you find you get spillage on your higher side it's worth going up in your cup size and padding your lower side. If you don't like padding then you can have your lower side tailored to fit.

I hope this helps you discover that some of your bras actually fit you - it's always a nice surprise! xx