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| My Mum and I have a long history of BooB chats! |
Firstly, you’re a great Mom for taking an interest in the breast welfare of your daughter. I've talked before about how instrumental my Mum's bra approach was to strengthening my self-esteem. Developing communication and awareness with your daughter about breast health, self-esteem and bras has a lifelong benefit so thank you to every Mom who gets in touch with us.
A teen's self-consciousness can prevent her going to a professional bra fitter. If you have a good relationship with your daughter you can help measure her at home or teach her how to measure herself by giving her a demonstration on yourself. If you’re seen to be comfortable with your boobs and know how to measure yourself, it will give your daughter confidence. Our Bra Size Calculator is also a good tool for young girls as it walks them through how to measure.
During her growth period your daughter should measure herself, or be measured, every 3 to 6 months. This may seem like a lot but the changes can be a whole cup size every three months and being in the wrong bra (spilling out of it) can be embarrassing for a young girl.
Lots of Moms think that they need to get their daughters into sports or minimizer bras to disguise their size. I NEVER recommend minimizer bras as they are harmful to the breast tissue and give the wearer a spread-out look that makes you look much bigger than you are. I recommend that teenagers should have a good sports bra but day to day bigger busted teenagers should wear well fitting bras.
Cost is of course a factor when children are growing into young adults. If your daughter is up to a D cup you can find great sales at the Bay or Nordstroms (their fitters are by far better than other high street stores). If your daughter is over a D cup then online stores like ours offer money off coupons all year round, just email them and ask for their recent discounts. The expense is a huge consideration, but the emotional foundations you lay down for a young woman by ensuring she is in the right bra last a lifetime.
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| A bra like Lucy is supportive, affordable and age appropriate |
Lots of Moms think that they need to get their daughters into sports or minimizer bras to disguise their size. I NEVER recommend minimizer bras as they are harmful to the breast tissue and give the wearer a spread-out look that makes you look much bigger than you are. I recommend that teenagers should have a good sports bra but day to day bigger busted teenagers should wear well fitting bras.
Cost is of course a factor when children are growing into young adults. If your daughter is up to a D cup you can find great sales at the Bay or Nordstroms (their fitters are by far better than other high street stores). If your daughter is over a D cup then online stores like ours offer money off coupons all year round, just email them and ask for their recent discounts. The expense is a huge consideration, but the emotional foundations you lay down for a young woman by ensuring she is in the right bra last a lifetime.
Despite their protests at not being understood, teenage girls are looking to their Moms to learn about body image. In one of the saddest reports I’ve read this year, children as young as six were criticising their bodies and wanting to be thinner. Teaching your daughter that her body is beautiful and something she should cherish and look after is the best defense against the onslaught of media and peer pressure.The sudden emergence of boobs is a weird thing (I went from braless to a 32C in 6 weeks!) but with communication and reassurance at home you can make it easier for your daughter to transition from girl to woman. xx
I love this post! I wrote about this on my first ever Lingerie Addict column as well. It's such an important topic.
ReplyDeleteI was one of those teenage girls who was forced into minimizer bras (UGH!) and basically told to hide my awkward breasts as much as possible. It was just this year that I started buying bras I love and embraced my chest size. I love my mother dearly, but I know that the way she acted on shopping trips (and about my curves in general) contributed to how I viewed my body negatively.
Thanks for writing this.
I know that you totally get it Holly, your writing shows a journey from confusion and hiding to celebration and pride. If you haven't read Holly's posts on The Lingerie addict you can find out about her work here http://www.cottagecopy.com/
ReplyDeleteI plan on writing a lot more about the journey of busty girls into curvaceous women. xx
I'm not as large as some of you lovely, busty ladies... my frame is often referred to as "petite" but I'm around 5'5" and technically 'full-busted'... but I think most people would judge me as 'average' in the breast department. Nevertheless, growing up I felt constantly smacked around by my mom emotionally about my figure, and she just wanted to cover me with a potato sack. I know she was afraid, I think she had bad experiences growing up and wanted to protect me, but she'll never know how many body/figure issues I have because of her reactions to me, and some of the attitudes I think she subconsciously poured onto me. (I can't blame her for everything, certainly, but I realize she contributed a lot to my often-negative perception of myself.) I'm trying to work through those issues now, as an adult, and although it's a slow process, I think I'm covering ground. :) But I just wanted to say, I think it's lovely when mothers try and support their daughters and reassure them about their changing bodies, instead of making them feel very negative about who they are and what they look like, even if they think they're just trying to protect them.
ReplyDeleteMy Dad always says that we are a product of our experiences and if you recognize which experiences hold you back and which ones propel you forward then you're ahead of the game. I hope you can understand and set aside the baggage that was your Mom's and not allow it to stay with you as yours. You are obviously a very loving a caring person who I expect has made someone else feel good about themselves physically and mentally and that's what I wish for you. Thank you for your comments xx
DeleteThank you... I try to be loving, and I try to see things from her perspective. It is hard sometimes, though, because I just hear her voice in my head sometimes, so negative. You have such a lovely "big sister" tone to your posts, though, I feel very drawn to your encouragement and the care that you obviously show for all of your clients and customers and your blog readers in general. I'm hoping that with enough time and such encouragement, from you and others that I've found, that some more of the old, sad messages will wash away.
DeleteAnd a part of me just wants to tell you and all of your busty ladies readers how lovely you all are--it might be hard to view things from the other end of the spectrum (and again, I'd say I'm "in the middle" but by no means beautifully well-endowed like some of you are), but a lot of women really would *die* to have such lovely, voluptuous figures as all of you. People are short, tall, big, little, and everything in between... It's a shame it's so hard sometimes to realize that we're all beautiful in our own ways. We so often want what we don't have, and it can affect us to our detriment if we obsess about it too much. :(
Thank you for your incredibly kind words. You have the key to your own happiness in the sentence 'to realize that we're all beautiful'. There is no one definition of beautiful but there is one definition of deserving - you are here, you are unique and you deserve to give yourself a break and enjoy being you. There's only you who can be you so what does anyone else know about it anyway!? ;) Sending big hugs to you from Vancouver xx
DeleteThank you for posting this! I'm a 15 year old 28HH, and it's nice to know there are others girls like me :) Sometimes it's hard when all my friends can get pretty lacey bras for fifteen dollars. And don't get me started on teenage boys! Anyway, it's articles like these that help me love my boobs. Thank you again!!
ReplyDeleteHello there! I know EXACTLY how you feel. I am 15 years, 32G, and I play three sports year-round. Not the best combination. I am so jealous sometimes of all the colors my friends get to choose from, while I'm standing there in the locker room with my huge-awkward-nude bras. It is so embarrassing for Cross Country; the jersey shirt fits everyone but me, and I have about three inches of white sports bra showing on both sides, and everyone comments on it. I feel so uncomfortable and humiliated sometimes, I just want to hide everything, but I feel this is a really nice article.
DeleteThank you both for sharing your stories. You are definitely not alone and by talking about your experiences we can start to change the attitudes and availability of bras for young women like you. I'm so sorry you are struggling with Cross Country but GOOD FOR YOU for sticking with it - your body will thank you for it! I know how tough it can be being the busty one at school but remember that there is NOTHING wrong with you. Be your bust's best friend and make sure you support her, love her and never apologize for her!! Sending you both huge hugs xx
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